Roadmaps of Consent

Hi, my name is Cat. I'm a consent junkie.

I am very, very dogmatic about consent. I believe that anyone has a right to withdraw consent to anything at any time and for any reason. I fucking love consent. I love safewords. I can be much more cruel, and push much harder, if I trust my partner to tell me when I go too far. I don't want to damage anyone, but I love being able to ride the edge of limits.

The process of getting consent is scary to people, or seems like a legal negotiation. It doesn't have to be either. So I'm going to talk about actual, real-life situation in which I've sought consent, or consent has been asked of me. If you'd like more ideas, or a general primer on consent in general, this Sex Talk Comic is funny, engaging, and very helpful.


Situation One: Consent in the Moment


I'm at Kitten's house. She's naked, I'm topless, and there are a few friends around in various states of undress. He ex-boyfriend and close friend, Dick, turns to me, and makes a polite gesture towards my breasts.

Dick: May I? Kitten seems very fond of them.
Me: Sure, go ahead.
Dick squeezes them a few times. I am bemused.
Dick: Very nice, thank you.
Me: My pleasure.
Kitten: That was surreal.


Situation Two: Getting Rejected

Kitten is on her bed, naked. Dick and I are both playing with her nipples. Dick leans forward, offering to kiss me.
Dick: Cat?
Me: Oh, I don't kiss men. Nothing personal.
Dick: Okay, then.
We return to teasing Kitten. Later, before he leaves, I give Dick a hug.

A Mission Statement, of Sorts

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.